Washington, D.C.- While the White House seems to have been steeped in chaos for the last eighteen months, due to liberal interference and resistance, it hasn’t gone unnoticed by the President that the Trumps had no White House dog. The Donald was at a crossroad. Every US President since 1901 had a pooch at the White House. Even that commie Kenyan guy that Soros and his cronies brought in through a side door had pet dogs in the White House.
William McKinley, or 25, was shot twice in the gut by an assassin on September 6th, 1901. He died September 14th, 1901 of gangrene contracted from the gunshot wounds. He was the last US President to not have a pet dog in the White House.
“Well, I ain’t going out like that,” quipped President Trump after being given this information by General Kelly. “I better get a [expletive] dog.”
The First Family was set to welcome a “Goldendoodle” named Patton into their new digs, but that fell through when the foster family couldn’t part with Patton.
The President and First Lady scoured the internet for just the right dog for their family. As soon as they saw the picture, the entire family knew this was the pet for them. “Maxi is the right bitch for us,” the first lady proclaimed. Maxi is an AKC “Whackadoodle” who was homeless. She had run away from a shelter in Compton, California and made it to the D.C. area where she was used as a fighting dog. She didn’t have many fights, but that tore up face looks like she lost every one.
Maxi still has to be cleared on health and Secret Service screenings before she can be a part of the White House family. Hope she’s not a Russian spy.