Jim Acosta Found Dead in Fort Marcy Park

CNN: Jim Acosta Found Dead In Fort Marcy Park

Mclean, VA- In a stunning and unexpected turn of events, Wolf Blitzer, CNN’s loveable dementia ridden anchor, has announced that embattled White House pool enforcer, Jim Acosta, has been found dead in Fort Marcy Park in Virginia. “These are dark times in America,” Blitzer began. “We, in the media, are plagued with a bully President … Read more

Steven Tyler is Caitlyn Jenner

Caitlyn Jenner To Grace SI’s Swimsuit Cover

New York, NY- Stephen Cannella, the managing editor for Sports Illustrated magazine, dropped a bombshell on the entire world today when he announced that Caitlyn Jenner would be the featured star of the world renowned SI swimsuit issue. “We, at Sports Illustrated, are very proud to announce that Caitlyn Jenner will be the focal point … Read more

OCASIO-CORTEZ NOT MY PRESIDENT CHALLENGE

Ocasio-Cortez Urges Liberals To Join “Not My President” Challenge

East Elmhurst, NY- The surprises just keep coming from the Democrat’s new socialist darling, Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez. Today was no exception, as the upstart community organizer pleaded with her would be constituents to join her in a showdown with President Trump for all the marbles… literally. Ocasio-Cortez turned up in East Elmhurst today with that wild … Read more

Maxine Waters is Trump's Bitch

The Trumps Finally Add A Dog To The White House Family

Washington, D.C.- While the White House seems to have been steeped in chaos for the last eighteen months, due to liberal interference and resistance, it hasn’t gone unnoticed by the President that the Trumps had no White House dog. The Donald was at a crossroad. Every US President since 1901 had a pooch at the … Read more

Liberals buying guns at record pace.

STUDY: Liberals Buying Guns At Record Pace

San Francisco, CA- According to a 2018 study from the Sturgis-Fellowes Institute, liberals, fearing an onrushing US civil war, are purchasing firearms at an extremely accelerated pace. “Our study of national firearm purchases, juxtaposed with national voter registration rolls, tells us that there has been 3,000% increase in firearm purchases by registered Democrats,” stated Archer … Read more

Joe Buck, John Hopkins oral sex in stairwell

Fox Sport’s Joe Buck Gets Public Oral From John Hopkins

Southampton, NY- If you thought the Phil Mickelson incident would be the biggest story coming out of Saturday at the US Open at Shinnecock, you would be wildly mistaken. Fox Sports, known for their football and baseball broadcasting, were thrown for a loop when pictures surfaced Saturday evening of their lead announcer, Joe Buck, receiving … Read more

Al Franken is a perverted pig.

Al Franken Killed By Minnesota Blizzards

Minneapolis, MN- Authorities in Minneapolis announced this morning that disgraced and former Minnesota Senator, Al Franken, has been confirmed as a blizzard casualty. “It has been a rough time for the Franken family,” Richard W. Stanek, Hennepin County Sheriff, began the news conference. “Of course everyone is familiar with Mr. Franken’s tragic comedy career. He … Read more

BITCHES BE CRAZY

Pelosi: U.S. Must Ban All Bridges, Bombs And Guns!

San Francisco, CA- In a special Tuesday press conference to address sanctuary city policy in San Francisco, Rep. Nancy Pelosi (D-Ca) was asked about the safety of American citizens in light of current events the last few weeks in Florida and Texas. “The school shootings must stop!” Pelosi began. “This is 21st century America and … Read more

Andrew McCabe dead

REUTERS:Fired FBI Deputy Director Found Dead In Fort Marcy Park, VA

Washington, DC- Reuters Washington bureau chief, Marilyn Thompson is reporting that at 6:30 pm, eastern standard time, the lifeless body of former FBI deputy director, Andrew McCabe was discovered by joggers in Fort Marcy Park in Virginia. “We received a call at 6:32 pm from persons who were jogging in the park reporting what appeared … Read more

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