Notre Dame Rollercoaster

Notre Dame Cathedral Installs New Rollercoaster

Paris, FR- The Pope was in Paris today to announce the grand opening of a new theme park and rollercoaster inside of the historic Notre Dame Cathedral. “Due to the ever decreasing numbers in both visitors to the cathedral and membership in the church, we have taken bold steps to increase the numbers in both … Read more

Breaking: Mormon Church To Allow Homosexuals Full Membership

Salt Lake City, UT- Local CBS affiliate KSL 5 reporter, Lori Prichard broke a bombshell story this morning on KSL 5 News Today. Reporting live from Temple Square, Prichard released a previously taped announcement from recently deceaced church president, Thomas Monson. “After more than a century and a half of discrimination, the LDS (Mormon) Church … Read more

TRUMP BOMB SAN FRANCISCO

Trump Backs Off North Korea And With Good Reason

Atlanta, GA- In his address to the NRA in Atlanta today, President Donald Trump announced, amongst other things, that he would be backing off of the North Korean dictator, Kim Jung Un and his backward country. “After great thought and negotiations with various other nations, I have decided that my administration will be backing off … Read more

Le Pen for the win.

Marine Le Pen Prepares To Trump France And The New World Order

Paris, FR- First Brexit, then Donald J. Trump, and now Marine Le Pen. It appears as though the civilized world is speaking loud and clear as to how they feel about the direction of this whole New World Order. They think the New World Order is BULLSHIT! First, Britain opts out of the European Union … Read more

JET NURSING SON

CBD Oil: Risking Prison To Save Your Child

Ann Arbor, MI- Would you risk a stint in prison to save your child’s life? If you were in the position I am in, watching your baby have seizure after seizure, you bet your sweet ass you would. My baby has epilepsy, namely Dravet syndrome, a chronic disorder that causes unprovoked, recurrent seizures. Occasionally the … Read more

Angela Merkel Unsure Which White House Batroom To Use

Washington, DC- German Chancellor, Angela Merkel popped in to the White House to visit with the American President, Donald Trump. While the visit was quite productive as to issues of the economies for both countries, there were a few hiccups. After a short morning visit and on the way to the big press briefing, Ms. … Read more

Mexican Protesters Halt WGC Mexico City Tournament

Mexico City, MX- Mexican citizens came out in droves to protest the policies of the American president at the WGC Mexico City Championship. “They just seemed to appear from nowhere,” said an upset Dustin Johnson, who was leading by four strokes when the rukus started. “This is golf, not politics. What the [expletive deleted] is … Read more

Democrats Reinvent Cold War Anxiety To Discredit Trump

Washington, DC- Dirty politics as usual in DC? Democrat politicians have set out on a plot to reinvent the anxiety and anguish of the cold war in an effort to discredit and possibly move toward impeachment proceedings of President Trump and his staff. After World War II, tensions between the United States and Soviet Russia … Read more

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