Chicago, IL- In an afternoon press conference, Chicago police superintendent, Eddie Riccio, announced that there has been a significant turn of events in the Smollett case.
“Just this morning, during further questioning of Jessie Smollett, we were able to get an admission from Mr. Smollett that the entire story of his assault was a hoax,” Riccio began. “We were also able to ascertain the genesis of the hoax, as well as corroborating evidence in regards to various accomplices, from Smollett. While we aren’t very intelligent people here in Chicago, given enough time, we can figure stuff out.”
Superintendent Riccio didn’t go into the details of the evidence or the names of accomplices.
TheNetSpies was able to contact Anthony Johnson, Chicago PD first deputy superintendent, who told us that Smollett had implicated the Clintons and other prominent democrats as the genesis of this hoax.
We were able to contact Smollett and asked him if he felt he was some sort of Manchurian candidate.
“I am not a candidate for any office,” Smollett told us as we laughed out loud. “If I have to go to jail, it’ll be ok. I have certain skills that make me very marketable in jail. If I had gotten away with this, Trump takes it in the ass. If I don’t get away with this, I take it in the ass. Win-win!”