WHO’S WATCHING THE GOVERNMENT THAT IS WATCHING YOU?
San Francisco, CA- According to a 2018 study from the Sturgis-Fellowes Institute, liberals, fearing an onrushing US civil war, are purchasing firearms at an extremely accelerated pace. “Our study of national firearm purchases, juxtaposed with national voter registration rolls, tells us that there has been 3,000% increase in firearm purchases by registered Democrats,” stated Archer … Read more
Southampton, NY- If you thought the Phil Mickelson incident would be the biggest story coming out of Saturday at the US Open at Shinnecock, you would be wildly mistaken. Fox Sports, known for their football and baseball broadcasting, were thrown for a loop when pictures surfaced Saturday evening of their lead announcer, Joe Buck, receiving … Read more
Detroit, MI- Huge throngs of Americans, estimated in the hundreds of thousands, began their march, from Detroit and Chicago, seeking asylum in the nation’s capitol today. “Our cities used to be beautiful burgeoning hubs for manufacturing and commerce,” said march organizer and Detroit resident, Darnell Robinson. “Now we are just a big deadly shithole! People … Read more
Minneapolis, MN- Authorities in Minneapolis announced this morning that disgraced and former Minnesota Senator, Al Franken, has been confirmed as a blizzard casualty. “It has been a rough time for the Franken family,” Richard W. Stanek, Hennepin County Sheriff, began the news conference. “Of course everyone is familiar with Mr. Franken’s tragic comedy career. He … Read more
San Francisco, CA- In a special Tuesday press conference to address sanctuary city policy in San Francisco, Rep. Nancy Pelosi (D-Ca) was asked about the safety of American citizens in light of current events the last few weeks in Florida and Texas. “The school shootings must stop!” Pelosi began. “This is 21st century America and … Read more
Washington, DC- Reuters Washington bureau chief, Marilyn Thompson is reporting that at 6:30 pm, eastern standard time, the lifeless body of former FBI deputy director, Andrew McCabe was discovered by joggers in Fort Marcy Park in Virginia. “We received a call at 6:32 pm from persons who were jogging in the park reporting what appeared … Read more
Broward County, FL- In a Fox News exclusive, David Hogg, the CNN shill in the wake of the Parkland school shooting, admitted to parroting the words and phrases fed to him by CNN in exchange for cash, airtime, and internet exposure. “I am just a teenager that was seduced by the sweet talking, money waving … Read more
Sacramento, CA- The Sacramento Bee is reporting that California Governor, Jerry Brown hosted a Democratic strategy summit today with notable figures, Barack Obama and former Mexican President, Vicente Fox. The summit, a meeting of Democrat minds, is an effort to thwart the rising tide of conservatism in the country. The two main topics that were … Read more
Los Angeles, CA- Los Angeles Times reporter and assistant managing editor, Kristina Bellatori dropped another bombshell in what can only be described as the ongoing US Congressional and political sex and domestic violence scandal this afternoon. “The Rob Porter domestic violence fiasco seems to have turned more than just the White House upside down,” Bellatori … Read more
Salt Lake City, UT- In an astonishing move this morning, Mormon church president, Russell Nelson announced that the leadership and membership of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints (Mormons) will stand behind embattled Trump Administration staffer, Rob Porter, with full force. “It is very common knowledge within the rank and file of … Read more