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Fairfax Proves Women Are Lying About Sexual Assaults

Richmond, VA- Embattled Virginia Lieutenant Governor, Justin Fairfax, took bold steps today to prove his innocence in regards to numerous complaints of sexual assault lodged against him. “Several women from my past have come forward with false claims of sexual assault,” Fairfax began his presser. “Today, since there is still a possibility that criminal charges … Read more

Trump crushes O'Rourke.

President Trump Crushes O’Rourke In Tweet

Washington, DC – President Trump crushed Dem hopeful, Betty O’Rourke, like a stale Pall Mall this morning. Democrats hate America. How can anyone hate the greatest country in world history. We are the envy of the civilized world. All problems in America, and the world, have been created by politicians. Stop creating problems, Congress! Do … Read more

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BREAKING: Kamala Harris Diagnosed With HIV-×

San Francisco, CA- Daniel Chen, spokesman and constituent director for California senator, Kamala Harris, announced that the California junior senator has been diagnosed with HIV-×. “While this is a sad day for our political family, we feel an obligation to inform our local constituents and national followers,” Chen began. “Senator Harris has been diagnosed with … Read more

Abrams hideous smile

President Trump Comments On Abrams’ Hideous Smile

Washington, DC – President Trump is taking his State of the Union address very seriously. He has a feeling he is going to be able to sway voters hearts and minds away from all of the Democratic Party rhetoric. The one thing he doesn’t seem too concerned about, is the Democrats choice for their rebuttal, … Read more

Trump pokes fun at pelosi

President Trump Takes A Poke At Nancy The Witch

Washington, DC- President Trump, obviously tired of hearing Nancy Pelosi’s endless jibber jabber about her canceled flight, took a public shot at the house speaker in his favorite forum… Twitter. “He canceled my flight just minutes before we were to leave, leaving us stranded,” whined Pelosi. “Then he announced, to Islamic terrorists around the world, … Read more

Phil and Tiger disappoint in the debacle in the desert

PGA: Phil And Tiger To Reimburse Fans For “The Match”

Las Vegas, NV- After scathing reviews of the less than poor performances of Phil Mickelson and Tiger Woods in “The Match”, both golfers have vowed to reimburse every fan that ordered the abysmal attempt to take golf to pay per view. “We didn’t prepare,” admitted Mickelson. “We thought we could just show up and thrill … Read more

Jim Acosta Found Dead in Fort Marcy Park

CNN: Jim Acosta Found Dead In Fort Marcy Park

Mclean, VA- In a stunning and unexpected turn of events, Wolf Blitzer, CNN’s loveable dementia ridden anchor, has announced that embattled White House pool enforcer, Jim Acosta, has been found dead in Fort Marcy Park in Virginia. “These are dark times in America,” Blitzer began. “We, in the media, are plagued with a bully President … Read more

Steven Tyler is Caitlyn Jenner

Caitlyn Jenner To Grace SI’s Swimsuit Cover

New York, NY- Stephen Cannella, the managing editor for Sports Illustrated magazine, dropped a bombshell on the entire world today when he announced that Caitlyn Jenner would be the featured star of the world renowned SI swimsuit issue. “We, at Sports Illustrated, are very proud to announce that Caitlyn Jenner will be the focal point … Read more

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